ninaherenorthere.com

An interview with the blogger is below. The blogger, as well as the interviewer, can be reached at: nina@ninaherenorthere.com.

Q: Tell me about yourself?
A: I write.

Q: You write…?
A: I write on yellow legal paper, index cards, and the occasional tampon box. I write in journals and in famous books. Sometimes I write on my hand. Most often, I write using my computer. This is me at work.

Q: What do you write?
A: Ha.

Q: No really, I’m serious. What do you write?
A: I write nonfiction…creative nonfiction or narrative nonfiction. Maybe it’s literary nonfiction, but not necessarily long-form journalism or new new journalism. Who am I kidding? I write ME-moir and personal essays. I love the upright pronoun, “I,” long and ramrod, like an erection. Most of what I write is embellished, crafted truth. Some might call it thinly veiled fiction, but I lack the artistry and imagination to be a Fiction writer. Don’t worry, I’m not a James Frey liar. I’m more of a David Sedaris exaggerator. I model myself after Sedaris, except when I’m channeling John McPhee. I read that it takes artists eight years to figure out what art they are in. Ask me this question in a few more years.

Q: Have you ever been published?
A: Let me first clear up the difference between paid and published. I’ve been paid to write and edit the Not For Tourists (NFT) Guide to San Francisco, to write celebrity profiles for Planetout.com, and to write copy for online banking applications.

If you want to pay me to write, you can email me at nina@ninaherenorthere.com. If you know someone who might want to employ me as a writer/editor (full-time, part-time, contract, freelance), please do not forward this URL. Email me instead. Then I can send my handy dandy resume in which my best foot is put forward, my other foot is not stuck in my mouth, and cliches are non-existent.

Q: But are you published?
A: An essay about my travels in Bosnia is in an old issue of Velvetpark. I have a (dyke-centric) travel story that won a Travelers’ Tales contest and is posted online. In 2003, I won the Bakpak Travelers Guide essay contest, and although I wasn’t technically paid for my essay, I did receive a prize package that included an expenses paid trip to Eastern Europe to write for the guide.

This is what I’ve learned form my career thus far: writing various iterations of “Please choose your account from the drop-down men, and click Continue” will bring good money, but even if my story about eating fried chicken asshole in Brunei after visiting the sultan’s amusement park is published, I will still be broke.

Q: You really like to travel.
A: That’s a common misconception. People think that because I’ve been to twenty-four countries I’m an intrepid explorer, but my travel lifestyle is based in economics. The key is to make money in the US and then spend it abroad. There are inherent restrictions, like visiting anywhere on the Euro. But I can find coffee and books in almost any country, which makes me happy enough. And as long as I’m in a foreign place, it doesn’t hurt to look around.

Q: So, now you’re going to tell me you’re not a dyke either?
A: Well, I can be a dyke. It depends with whom I’m talking and the size of his/her/hir alternative vocabulary. Sometimes I let people, like my relatives, think of me as a lesbian, because it’s better than not being thought of at all. With friends, I might be a homo or one of the gays. But I prefer queer. For many reasons. One is that I can be queer without being a Man or a Woman. I’ve been referred to and have thought of myself as genderqueer, transgender, a female-bodied guy, and a boy, among others, like your garden variety woman. I’ll be getting into this and more.

Q: What exactly is the purpose of your blog?
A: I’ve been told by accomplished writers that I need to “build my platform,” market the “Brand of You,” and stake out “web real estate.” I held off, sure that my platform would be made from twigs and brambles, my virtual house would be covered in eyesores of graffiti, and the Brand That Is Me would be boycotted and black-balled by all commercial (and non-commercial) organizations as sick, twisted, and undesirable. In short, I would do damage. And I probably will.

I will bring up subjects that are unfit for daytime hours, family places, public viewing, and private consumption. I will cover a hodgepodge of subjects, like San Francisco, queer issues, travel, “work” and my “career,” the day’s mundanities, pop culture, and my favorites–the writing process, books, magazines, any surface with words, and all that is literary but not highbrow.

This is my safe space to mix metaphors, splice commas, and split infinitives. A place to post multimedia projects. An outlet for my voice. I hope that amongst the inevitable garbage and lapses of self-indulgence, I will say something of value, make a small contribution to the betterment of society, connect myself to people near and far, offer a new angle on what’s already been said. And if I do nothing but make you guffaw once, breaking the cubicle silence on a dreary Wednesday morning, that’ll be enough. Please laugh, even if it’s at my expense.